[MOSAIC] reflections on writing and reading=

[elaine garan]

Bill-- You asked about what we're reading.  My friend Ardie Cole  
recommended EAT, PRAY and LOVE by Elizabeth Gilbert.  Have you ever  
read Ann Lamott's Bird by Bird? It's a book that really makes you want  
to write, write, write. If you haven't written a book, let me just  
share what it was like for me. If you don't care, just delete this  
email but just thinking of Ann Lamott's description of what it means to  
write, reminded me of what I went through.

I started Smart Answers on June 15 last summer and had it finished  
(except for revisions) by August. It was an incredible process. The  
first step was that it seemed absolutely impossible. Everything I've  
ever written was impossible before I started. All I could think was, "I  
can't do this." and that first brazen act of putting the very first  
words out there was like jumping out of plane. Exhilarating but  
terrifying and this feeling that I could not control the words. Then, I  
got into it and I absolutely, totally obsessed on that book. I wrote  
and wrote and wrote and wrote for hours at a time to where my legs  
would cramp up and I didn't even realize it until I got up and couldn't  
walk. In other words, I was totally in the writing zone.

When I went out for groceries, I would force myself to buy only enough  
to last a day or two because I was seriously afraid that I would just  
stay in the house and not go out for days at a time and I knew that  
wasn't healthy. There wasn't a night when  I went to bed that I didn't  
think "Where am I in the book? What will I write next?" and there  
wasn't a morning I woke up when my first thought wasn't "Where am I in  
the book?"

I told my editor that at first, that extended obsessive process of  
creation is like having a long, fascinating conversation--in my head of  
course-- with a really smart person who totally agrees with  everything  
I say. Toward the end though, it became for me, a very claustrophobic  
process. I couldn't stand the sound of my own voice in my head that  
preceded the words I typed-- just droning on and on and on.

I think everyone should experience that sort of magnificent and  
horrible absorbtion in their own creation at some point in their life.  
I talked to Nancie Atwell at IRA in Toronto and I know she gets it  
because she too sat there through 11 and 12 hour days writing,  
rewording and making the words do what she wanted, I've also told my  
editor that when the words magically come out just right that there  
comes a point where I don't even care if anyone else likes it or not. I  
have achieved something personal and intrinsic. There is just nothing  
else like it. There is a creative rush, a true high that comes at some  
times during the process.

Actually, at this moment, I'm writing a little story for my  
granddaughter who's five. Playing around with a children's book is  
refreshing after writing my Smart Answers for so long.  The chances of  
it ever getting published are about zero. It's very hard to break into  
that genre. I don't care though. I'm just so thrilled with this  
adventure. I have this little movie running in my head and I'm working  
the words to get them to obey me and come down on the page the way I  
want them and I'm picturing my granddaughter acting out the story and  
laughing at it.

I guess what I'm saying is that we've all experienced the reading zone.  
But I hope you will trust yourselves enough to take a leap into the  
writing zone even if no one ever reads it but you. There is just  
nothing else like it. Read Annie Lamott's book and there's a good  
chance you will be seduced into the writing zone.



> en have a book, but it doesn't stop me from posting what I
> think and write....
>
> Besides, everyone here buys the books mentioned.  I'm sure Elaine and  
> Nancy
> will sell quite a few copies based on what is being discussed here, so
> what's the problem?  I know I have bought many books based on the
> recommendations of the people here...I trust your opinions.  And like  
> any
> good book, most have led me to others, and I'm (I hope) a better  
> teacher (if
> not a better person) for reading them.
>
> Right now, I'm reading TOTALLY POSITIVE TEACHING by Joseph Ciaccio,
> GENERATION ME by Jean Twenge, THE END OF EDUCATION by Neil Postman, THE
> TEACHER'S CALLING by Gloria Durka, and LETTER TO MY SON ON THE LOVE OF  
> BOOKS
> by Roberto Controneo....and that's just my professional reading!  Have  
> MOT,
> 2nd edition on order, of course!  That doesn't include my LOOOONG list  
> of
> non-professional lurid romances, thrillers, fantasy, and young adult  
> novels
> (do they count as professional also?).  Any other suggestions for  
> summer
> reading?
>
> Bill
>
>
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